Felo-de-se
NOTE:-Please do not look for the meaning of the title before reading the story below as it will ruin the effect that the author wanted to build. Its an essential requisite.
This is an entirely new forte. I have never ever tried writing fiction. This was only done after a suggestion of a friend. Hope you enjoy whatever has come out of it. :)
She waded through the clump of grasses, struggling to reach the narrow strip of path, that is devoid, save few patches, of long and dense thicket of grasses, characteristics of a typical tropical evergreen forest. On reaching the trail, she walked on, in an assured manner, as this was the path that she was well aware of. So much so, that even in darkest night, she would be able to find her way to the other end. Walking along this path to fill the large bucket of water from the river had been a daily ritual for her since the past 2 decades. It had been due to her, and her ancestors’, regular and diurnal treads to-and-fro along the same path, which had led to it being bereft of shoots and grasses.
However, this time the purpose of her stride was different. It was daily at dawn, at the cluck of her pet hens that she used to walk the path to fill the bucket.
And even though the sun was at horizon, it wasn’t dawn this time. It was Dusk.
She shivered as the chilled wind touched her naked arms. She was aware that it would be cold and windy, yet she wore only a thin piece of clothe just to cover her modesty, the only thing she was left with. And besides, she did not want that her better clothes should be thrown away after today, which she was sure would happen had she worn them. At least, her little sister could still make use of them.
As she continued along the road, slowly, she pensively gazed at the trees, the sky, the rocks and mountains. It was as if she was memorizing the details of each and every aspect of things, animate and inanimate both, which had constituted her life. Yet she appeared to be in a dreamy state. Unaware of everything around her.
And she continued on, slowly. Unhurriedly.
The sun was now almost touching the horizon. Few minutes and it will sink, vanishing for the day, only to re-appear. But she was almost there. She would be besides the tree on the shore of the river any moment now. She had to reach before it sets. It was imperative.
As she walked the last steps towards her destination, she realized that there was silence all around. The forest was never silent at this time of day. Birds return to their nests and nocturnal animals begin their scrounge for prey at this hour. Yet, today everything was still. It was as if, even the forest was aware of what was to come. And it had stopped to witness the act. And maybe to show its discontentment.
There was melancholy. As within so without.
She finally reached her spot. On the edge of the small river she sat, nearby a tree. She reached out and touched the tree. It was her tree. It was the tree that was planted by her father the day she was born. And she knew this was the place where she needed to perform her final act.
She looked at the sky to determine how much time was left. Around 10 minutes was what she estimated. The sun would sink in just 5 minutes. And so would her sun.
She took out the flowers from within, where she kept them safe, close to her bosom. She inhaled them, and kissed them. Slowly she grinded the petals, as well as the stems, and added to them few drops of the water. And with steady hands, she swallowed the mashed petals and stems.Moments later, she started to talk to herself. And she talked in a melodious voice, as if singing to herself. And her singing was accompanied by her dance. Had there been a witness to the scene, the words recorded by him would be these.
“Ahh….the end has come, all things said and all things done.
This paste will relieve me of all my pains, so the wise woman had said.
These are flowers from the plant Digitalis lanata, as the learned called,
But to her the plant was Tilpushpi, the name given to it in India.
It was from there the wise woman had got the seeds,
Because the flowers yielded excellent ointment for wounds to treat.
Yet these were dangerous, as they could stop the heart from beating,
And in few minutes the person would be dead and his soul would be leaving.”
She danced and sang these words twice, and then fell down. Yes, she thought to herself, it was working. The wise woman had said that the first sign would be that her legs would go weak. And she slowly crawled towards the tree, struggling yet smiling.
The tree was different because it was parallel to the horizon. So she climbed and lied down upon it. She had gone to sleep like this many a nights. And today too, she would go to sleep. Never to wake up again.
She let her hands fall, and touched the water, generating tiny ripples. The water felt cold. She remembered her father once telling her that life originated in water. And she smiled at the co-incidence that her life is ending near it.
A squirrel came running from nowhere towards the river. It looked intently at her for few moments. She asked him to carry a message to the entire forest to look after her sister. It was as if the squirrel understood her because she scampered away immediately.
She knew the time has come. She lacked the strength to turn her head and look at the sky. So she looked at the surface of water hoping to witness the last rays of sun. It was as if even nature wanted to fulfill her last wish because she was able to do so. The sun appeared all bright and hazy. As if there was a halo surrounding it. It’s the effect of the flowers. The wise woman had warned that this would happen too.
Within three breaths the sun vanished, hidden behind the other edge of skyline. And she closed her eyes.
The sun has gone down, only to rise again.
Her sun has gone down too, never to rise again.
-Setu 'Se2' Gupta
-Setu 'Se2' Gupta
27 Commendable Insights:
Your narration is awesome.. :-) Just good enough to picturize your expressions..
Good work..
Oh. That's very vivid. I can imagine it all playing in my head. You could do much much better if you had a nicer story line. I mean, honestly I really lost track of what was exactly happening. Yet I must say your style of writing is very illustrative. You should be working on this genre as well. You'll do great. ;)
Oh and whatever is felo-de-se?
beautifully written...takes u to a different world...like standing there n being witness to it..suicide seemed beautiful in d way u picturised it...keep up the good work... :)
@vini-Thanx a lot...next time i'll definitely try to have a "happy-ever-after" for you....:)
@henna- I will try to have a more concrete story line next time...I know what you mean by loosing track...it might because of it being too descriptive...!!
And yeah...Felo-de-se means an act of committing suicide...:D
@anchal-Thanks yaar...waise i never intend to make suicide seem beautiful...but am glad you thought it so...thanku :D
I loved the images you painted with your words, you know? They were so dramatic and that was perfect because it really was a dramatic situation. It was really, really good :)
@sana-Thank you sana. I was kind of apprehensive about the result, afraid that it will be too boring, but all of your kind and encouraging words have really helped in boosting me confidence. Thanks for the appreciation again..:)
Four words:
"A Picture well Painted"
the story was anything but boring..... somehow reminded me of susan coolidge if i remeber correctly..... n yeah you seemed to have glorified suicide.... once if you could write on this aspect of suicide.... that it is not an act of a coward... requires great courage to take one's own life.... something oppposite to what generally people feel about suicide!!!!!!
@Niyam-
Four Words- "Thank you very much"...:)
@aakanksha-
And comparing me with Susan Coolidge is far too unreal for me to believe. I used to read her when i was a kid/teen...so it really means much if this reminded you of her...:)
Oh well, like i said, i never intend to glorify suicide...It takes a lot of courage to take one's own life, but it takes more courage to stand and face life...So in reality suicide is an act of cowardice, 'an-easy-way-out'.
I know this goes against to what i have written, but well...Its fiction :D
Setu, it's a good attempt...choice of words is awesome...Beautifully written but it's just a story. waise could you plz tell me that "felo-de-se" is from which language...???
Waise non-fiction is better..
Well done! Over from Kim Ayres' blog...
Pearl
Kim Ayere's blog????????????
http://kimayres.blogspot.com/
@Teena-
Thanks a lot girl...but i must say I had thesaurus open next to me...wouldn't have found such apt words otherwise...*grins*
Felo-de-se is a latin word...It was very heavily used in law and in other older literature...
And thanx for your support to non-fiction..will definitely keep this in mind...:)
@Pearl-
Thanks Pearl...
Kim's blog is really really awesome...:)
@anonymous-I don't know what you intend to do by replying to your own question, that is only if there are two anonymous people commenting on my blog....!!
amazingly wonderful!!!!! looks like you are a fan of shakespere. your style of writing is very much similar to him. keep up the good work...
beautiful description and lovely choice of words... But write something more optimistic next time..:)
Suicide is more like a "spur of the moment" choice. Personally, I am not sure about the act of cowardice thing. Sometimes it's just out of a feeling of pointlessness. Will you keep writing blogs if you were the ONLY one alive? Maybe you'll write Diary entries, but blogs?, I dunno. You'll get tired someday. Of course, I think everyone should give life a chance, since it's just temporary, we'll have a LOT of time to be dead later. But still, I dont like to call those who died COWARDS. Delusional?, some, cowards?, very few. A suicidal mind, a wounded mind, is a dangerous one. It'll loathe life, and find peace in death. Findind peace isnt cowardice. It's just longing way beyond control. However you are partially true, I remember my OWN words, my FIRST song ever, started with "What will you do when you're living in a lie, when you're too cowardly to live, and too brave to die!"
Love the blog.
Thought you might be interested.
Check us out.
"thetweedz.blogspot.com"
=]
Found your blog through Kim's. This is a really beautiful piece of writing, your descriptions are like frames in a movie: full of images and details that add to its beauty.Reminiscent of Prevert's poems
Well done
I read and liked this post
thanks
visit:- http://rhymesandverses.blogspot.com/
nice and very powerful.
ficklecattle.blogspot.com
It's just awesome. Made me realize that life can have a quite emotional meaning to it also.
Though I don't much like sad things, this story truly touched my heart.
@anonymous-
your comparing me with shakespeare speaks a lot regarding my capability though I would take it as a rather too high a compliment to be true...
still thanks a lot for such an expression...:)
@Dimpy-
Like i said, it was just my first attempt...would definitely try writing something 'goody-goody/ next time...:)
@Niyam-
i know this reply is too late, and you might not probably read it...but your own lines in the end prove that you yourself are slightly mixed with your opinion about suicide...:)
Maybe another year, and we might have a good debate about it...:D
@The tweedz-
Thanks for liking it...:) would definitely check out your blog...!!
@Falak-
aaah..!! so many people coming over from kim's blog...:)
Thanks a lot for such highly descriptive appreciation...
though i still fid it hard to digest when people are reminded by my first piece of prevert's and coolidge's work....They were giants...!!
Thanks a lot again..and welcome to my conclusions....:D
@fickle cattle & Suruchi Puri-
Thanks a lot for your comment....:)
will check out your blog soon...:)
@rohan Jain-
i'm glad that i played a part in one of your realizations...:)
It matters a lot that I succeeded in showing another side of the moon, though it might be the darker one....
And even though we only see moon with it's light on, we forget that it still has a dark side of its own..
Thanks a lot for such a wonderful comment...:)
Thanks for visiting my blog. Yours makes mine seem so run-of-the-mill and unimaginative in comparison! This is a story that makes you think.
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